January 2017

Misconception

“I’m pregnant!”
“Come again?”
“I’m pregnant! My boobs are bigger, I have morning sickness, and I’m craving some pickle juice right now!”
“You’re a man, Jack.”
“My name’s Jackie, Liam.”
“Oh boy… when did your wife finish that hypnosis course again?”
“Three months ago, why?”
“It seems like it was a maternity ago,” Liam grinned.

I can only ask for your forgiveness in regards to the terrible pun written above. On second thought, no I don’t. I hope you had fun.


Frame of Mind

“Too square, too round…” Patrick complained.
Sheila picked up another wooden frame. “What about this one?”
“Too… hmmm… too…” he mumbled, focused on the intersecting patterns all around the edge.
“… enthralling, perhaps?” She tapped her fingernails.
“Mmm hmm,” he nodded.
“We’ll take ten, then,” she chirped.
The shopping spree was off to a wonderful start.

I broke a picture frame earlier today. I wrote this one because of it. I wonder if you would enjoy being entranced like this.


House-Training

“You want this… so badly… and when I snap my fingers, you’ll beg for it…” Sarah said, mellifluously.
*SNAP*
Richard opened his eyes and knelt before her.
“Please, honey… please! I need to do it! May I please be allowed to do the dishes?”
“Of course, sweetie,” she smiled.
Next lesson: take out the trash.

Wrapping up the first month of this year’s challenge with a little bit of… discipline. I’m sure the nature of it proved to be somewhat surprising for some of you though.


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