Spell… H-A-L-L-O-W-E-E-N 2022 – Day 5

Today, we have another humorous piece of micro-fiction, this one concerning zombies and horror tropes. Have fun.

Horror Tropes

The zombies surrounded Alan, their rotting limbs reaching for his throat. Unable to fend them off, he screamed louder than ever before.
“Arghhh!”
Almost immediately, the foul creatures stopped moving and covered their ears.
“Hey, easy with the shrieks, okay? We’re undead, not deaf!” A woman with the right side of her face partially decomposed said.
“Y-you…” Alan gasped. “You talk?”
“We all do,” said another zombie, a middle-aged man with a circular saw stuck on his brain. “You thought we were just mindless beasts on the hunt here?”
“Well… yeah.”
“Kids these days!” grumbled an eighty-year-old grandma. “That’s what you get for consuming horror tropes.”
“I don’t understand.”
“We’re in full possession of our capacities, okay?” the first woman spoke again. “Sure, we look like shit but that can’t be helped. It’s a side effect of our Mistress’ virus, okay?”
Alan shook his head. Had he lost his mind for good?
“I’m confused…”
“Understandable, I guess. None of us asked for this but it happened. Our bodies are in shambles and our minds are entrapped. We can talk, we can sing, we can dance, but we can never disobey her, and she wants us to convert you, too. Please don’t resist, okay?”
“You’ll never take me alive!” Alan snarled.
“Another dumb cliche…” the elder zombie said. “Hun, of course, we’re not taking you alive. You need to die to become one of us but don’t worry, it’s not as bad as it seems.”
The zombies crept forward, eager teeth hungry for his flesh. He didn’t have time to scream again.